Last Day of My Life Read online

  “When I got out of the army, I made them promise me that they’d watch out for each other. They promised me. They fucking promised.” Jack said as he hung his head.

  Since I wasn’t sure if that comment was directed at me or just said to get it off his chest, I stayed silent.

  It was disconcerting to see a man of Jack’s caliber brought so low. Normally, when you saw a man like him, you would never associate him with any type of weakness. However, he was as human as they come and right now, he was hurting very badly. There was nothing I could do; nothing I could say to make this any better.

  Only time would dull these wounds. He would always have that part of him missing. Adam’s vivaciousness would forever be ingrained in him. I hoped that Tai made it through this okay because I didn’t think Jack would be able to handle it if he didn’t.

  ***

  It was two days later that Tai finally woke from his coma.

  He was a big ‘ol shithead, too. Growling and snapping at everyone. I’d gone out to the coke machine to buy a drink when I heard him yelling. Jack was at the fire department planning the funeral with Adam’s parents. It was decided that they would wait until Tai was able to attend and everyone had high hopes that he’d wake up within the next day.

  Well, here he was, awake and pissy. Just like any man, but he had more right to be pissy than most. Those burns he had would pain him for a long time to come. The third degree ones might even need grafts if any type of infection set in.

  Dropping the extra change into my pocket, I ran to Tai’s door with my coke in one hand and my phone in the other. I texted Jack to tell him Tai was awake before pushing in through Tai’s hospital door.

  I got there just in time to see him throw his water pitcher at the closest nurse.

  “Taima! What the fuck is wrong with you?” I half screamed at him.

  He froze.

  Oh, so slowly he turned his head away from the nurse and locked his eyes on me. Then they widened in surprised shock.

  Jack had called Tai and Adam the very day I’d shown up. He’d told them all that he’d learned about my disappearance, and tasked them with digging as much information out of it that they could.

  However, knowing that I was alive and actually being able to clearly see that I was alive was a total different ballgame.

  “Holy sh-crap.” He rasped.

  His eyes were wide with shock; he even blinked a few times, almost like he was seeing if I’d disappear if he closed his eyes. His voice was incredibly scratchy sounding; I went to him and twisted the top off the coke, put the straw in it from his discarded drink, and held it up against his lips.

  “He can’t have that!” The nurse screeched.

  “Sure he can. You want it, don’t you Tai?” I smiled at him playfully.

  “Absolutely.” He grunted and then took a big swig.

  Commotion in the hallway made everyone in the room look towards the door in utter awe. One woman was yelling and screaming so loud that you could literally hear it from the other side of the ward.

  “My husband is in here and I want to see him!” The woman screeched.

  I looked away from the door when I heard Tai moan. My head whipped around, absolutely terrified that he was in pain, but he looked disgusted instead. It wasn’t until I heard the commotion come closer and the woman screech Tai’s name that I knew he was disgusted with whoever was outside the door.

  “Annie,” He said looking tired. “Get rid of her, please.”

  Flashes of him calling me that years and years ago went through my brain, and I beamed at him. Recovering lost memories was like winning the jackpot. I didn’t know just how empty I felt until they were recovered, and took their rightful place in my mind.

  This particular one was of him deciding that I looked a lot like the ‘grown up’ version of Orphan Annie; from that day forward, he didn’t call me by anything else. I always argued that my hair was quite a bit darker and longer than Annie’s, but he begged to differ.

  He always used to say, “Red is red. Curly is curly. Yours is both.”

  It was a little hard to argue with that logic and I just let him have it. It was easier. The Stoker men could argue with a fricking brick wall.

  Jolting from my memories from a particularly nasty threat from the woman, I stepped out into the hall and was practically shoved up against the glass door. The woman was pissed by the looks of it, but if Tai didn’t want her there, she wouldn’t be there. No if’s, and’s, or but’s about it.

  The woman was giving me crazy eyes and I seriously thought she could totally resemble Hannibal Lector if she put her mind to it.

  “Can I help you?” I asked sweetly.

  Her mouth pursed and she took one-step closer to me before raising her finger and poked me in the chest. “You can get out of my way so I can go see my husband.”

  “Lady, I don’t know who you are, but Tai wants you to leave, so you’re gone.” I replied sharply.

  Anger was evident in my voice, but I couldn’t control it. Tai was mine, as was Jack. I loved them both and I wouldn’t tolerate some bitch upsetting him. I didn’t want to have to kick this girl’s ass but I sure wasn’t against the idea. In fact, with each poke in the chest she gave me, I lost more and more of the desire to be nice.

  “He is my husband. Not yours, even though you probably think he’s going to give you something. Well to bad fire crotch, he’s mine.” She sneered.

  “Fire crotch?” I asked confused.

  “If the panties fit.” She confirmed with a nod.

  “What the hell? Who do you think you are? Obviously, you’re not his wife. Oh, you may carry his last name, but you aren’t his wife. No, a wife,” I said with emphasis on wife. “A wife would be at her husband’s bedside for the past two days. A wife would know about his brother’s wife. A wife would be doing absolutely anything to get to her husband’s side, instead throwing a little bitch fit about not getting what she wants.”

  I wasn’t poking her, but I was backing her away from the door, with my body, towards the other side of the hallway. I kept my voice at a controllable level, unlike Bimbo Barbie.

  The elevator dinging drew my attention away from BB and I wasn’t ready for the slap that she leveled across the right side of my cheek. Freezing for all of two seconds, I came unstuck in a snap, reared back my left arm, and let fly.

  My fist struck her nose with a resounding crunch that was music to my ears. Blood launched itself out of her nose as her head whipped to the side and I was pleasantly pleased with the sight if I did say so myself.

  It wasn’t often that I got physical. In fact, it was near impossible. However, the attitude she was throwing to the nurses and myself, as well as the derogatory names, didn’t instill any patience in me. It only flamed my desire to wipe that snotty little smirk right off her face. And so I did.

  “Nice,” A lazy, amused voice said from behind me. “Glad all my advice paid off.”

  I turned and came face to neck with Jack. Stepping back, I looked at his face and saw the coldness lurking in his eyes and knew that if Bimbo Barbie was smart, she’d stay on the floor.

  Unfortunately, she wasn’t.

  She came up with a flurry and launched herself at me. Jack didn’t move until she was inches from my face; and move he did. He had his large hand pinned against her chest holding her to the wall. Blood was slowly leaking out of her nose onto the designer white pea coat she was wearing and I let a smile slide across my face.

  “You red headed bitch!” She snarled.

  “Oh, how original. I’ll have to remember that one.” I said with a roll of my eyes.

  “Let me tell you something, Marissa.” He said very quietly. So quiet that I could barely even hear it. “My brother may put up with your bullshit because he has to, but I don’t. Daddy can’t hold my job over my head. Daddy can’t blackmail me into marrying your ass. I’ve been working on my brother for four years now to divorce your bony ass but it wasn’t until this past month that he
finally decided to do it. And guess what? You’re almost fucking divorced. Congrats.”

  He finished on a hiss and I held my smile in check so I didn’t start anything again.

  “You-you can’t do that!” She whispered.

  “Oh, do it I did. This time next week, you will be a free woman. Your daddy isn’t the only one with connections.” He said, pushing away from her and turning around.

  He wasted no time grabbing my hand and leading me back into Tai’s room. Once there, he lowered the blinds so she couldn’t see in and turned to face his brother.

  Questions were burning through my mind, but I held my tongue. They needed this moment. I backed away and sat in the furthest corner I could without actually leaving the room.

  The next hour went the way it should. They were quiet for a long time before Tai finally broke and apologized for not saving Adam.

  Jack’s response filled my heart with such love for him that I thought I’d burst.

  “Taima, I know you’re hurting, but you need to realize that there are things in this world that you have no control over. Adam was a good man and we need to remember the good times. Don’t hang his death on your shoulders. We all know that you did everything you could to help him. It’s why you almost died yourself.”

  “Yeah. I don’t want to talk about it yet. I want to get through the funeral first and then I’ll tell you; just… just not yet.” He said gruffly.

  “Okay.” He said and then kissed his brother on top of his head.

  “Okay.” Tai said relaxing into the pillows. “Okay.”

  Chapter 7

  If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.

  -Will Rogers

  Jack

  The door was shaking with the force of Kodiak’s lunges. He wanted out so badly that I was seriously glad that Adam and I had reinforced the door when he had a break in three years ago.

  Kodiak was a smart dog and I knew he’d know something was wrong. It wasn’t like Adam to leave the dog alone for more than his twenty-four hour shifts. Once or twice a shift, he’d run over to his house to let him out. Sometimes even taking him to the station with him when he could. He became the station’s mascot of sorts, and it was very rare for him to be by himself.

  He was at the station the day that Adam died and even though he knew me, I knew that I wasn’t a good enough substitute for Adam. It would take Kodiak a while to adjust and I was hoping with Winter being here, he would calm down some.

  I waited to tell Winter the story of Kodiak. I wanted to see if the memories would come to her on her own terms, without my interference. I’d give it a couple of hours to see how things went and if she still didn’t have any memory of him, then I would tell her about Kodiak.

  Taking Winter’s hand, I set her to the side of the door, gave her a look of warning to stay put and opened the door to Adam’s house. Of course, I made sure to brace my knees first.

  Kodiak hit me like a ton of bricks. One second I was braced with my legs planted firmly on the front porch and the next I had Kodiak’s front paws on my shoulders and his face in mine. He was licking me for all he was worth.

  It took him a few moments to realize that there was someone else there with me but when he did, he was off of me in a flash and then doing the same thing to Winter. Only this time, he was much more enthusiastic about it. Like he was greeting a long lost friend.

  Which, in truth, he was.

  When Kodiak was just a baby, Winter found him on the side of the road, near death. It took Winter four vets before she finally found someone that would treat Kodiak. At first, she didn’t understand what, exactly, she’d picked up off the side of the road.

  When the first vet turned her down, however, her eyes were finally wide open. The vet explained that he was a wild wolf, and no matter what rehabilitation they could do for him, he wasn’t a safe animal to have housed in a small animal clinic. They didn’t want to put their employees, nor the dogs and cats in any unnecessary risk, and turned her down flat.

  She went through that three more times before finally taking him to an older vet that was well experienced. He did, of course, have conditions, and Winter followed every one of them to a T. The vet agreed to help, but, in turn, Winter had to take care of Kodiak. She did that twice a day, every day, for six weeks before Kodiak was finally able to come home.

  However, since my apartment had a ‘no pet’ policy, and Winter was barely living at home as it was, Adam was the next choice. Adam was reluctant at first, but with Winter begging and pleading, he caved in his usual fashion when it came to a teary-eyed woman.

  Kodiak wasn’t too happy with the arrangement at first either; it took adjustment on all of their parts, and Winter and I were over there visiting Kodiak just as much as we were at my own place.

  It wouldn’t be until a year after Winter’s disappearance that I realized just how different Kodiak was. Adam used to write me letters explaining the differences in him. Seeing it with my own eyes and reading about it were two different things.

  Seeing them together now, seeing how happy Kodiak was, was a real revelation. It was also quite sad, because when Kodiak realized Adam was gone for good, he might just spiral back into the depression he sunk into when Winter was gone.

  Winter giggled as the big burly wolf dog practically tackled her to the ground.

  “Hi, Kodiak!” She said enthusiastically.

  I was disappointed, because the longer she was in his presence, the more I became aware that it wasn’t going to bring the memories back as I thought it would.

  “Let’s get inside you two. We’ve got some plans to iron out, and then we need to get to the wake by six.” I said to both of them.

  Winter scrambled to her feet, and fit herself into my side as we walked into Adam’s house.

  Sights, sounds, and smells assaulted me; reminding me of what I’d lost. Adam’s prized sectional that was the site of so many laughs, was the first thing I saw as I made my way into the room. Then it was the pictures of us on the mantle. The picture of Adam and Winter at our wedding, where he stood in for me, saying the very vows that I painstakingly put every ounce of my feelings into.

  However, the hardest, was the site of the dream catcher I’d gotten him all those years ago. In fact, it was nearly eighteen years to the day.

  When we met, we didn’t get along so well. It was only when we were both nearly attacked by a dog that we became friends. He made a comment that he would have nightmares for years thinking about the dog almost biting his leg off. The next day, I’d brought it to him and explained the significance of one.

  He’d cherished it. It followed him from his parent’s house, to his college dorm room, and finally to his home. Each time I saw it hanging in a place of importance, I was struck with just how much I lucked out getting him as a best friend.

  Sure, we’d fought like cats and dogs, but that didn’t hurt our friendship. No, it strengthened it. Gave us firm building blocks that withstood the test of time.

  Death was an unforgiving bitch though, and every day I would hurt thinking about what I’d lost. I was lucky to have Winter back, because, what would hold me together right now if not for her?

  ***

  “Do you guys remember when he found the baby outside the station?” Paulo asked, wobbling drunkenly towards the bar where we were seated.

  “Yeah! Did you see his face? He was so pissed! He saw the mom running down the street, but when the Chief started spouting shit about the Safe Haven law, he got it under control. The kid’s six now.” Donnie said, just as drunkenly.

  We were about six shots, multiple beers, and a bottle of Jack Daniels down, and we were definitely feeling it. We needed it though. We all needed that release that talking about Adam would give us. Reminding us of the good times, and the bad, that we all had with him.

  “He met him not too long ago. The kid was so excited to meet the firefighter who saved him.” Duncan called from further down the bar.


  “Hey! Make some room!” Tai called, as he limped slowly into the huddle that was surrounding us.

  Adam’s dad got up from his seat and moved it closer to our group, giving Tai a place to sit down. “Since you’re going to be a dumbass and check out of the hospital against doctor’s orders, you have to at least sit down.”

  Tai smiled in thanks, but didn’t reply. Not that he could say much. He was doing it against doctor’s orders, but this was only going to be a once in a lifetime kind of thing, and he didn’t want to miss it. As much as I hate to admit, I would have done the same thing in his shoes.

  Kodiak got up from his sprawl against the base of the bar and padded over to Tai, nuzzling his hand. Tai grasped onto Kodiak’s fur and gave him a bear hug. It had to have hurt, but he did it anyway.

  It was silent, while everyone watched the interaction between Tai and Kodiak, but soon it picked up again. Everyone told stories. Each and every one of them tried to top the last one with even more embarrassing escapades.

  I stopped them at the sex ones though; there was no way I wanted to have his parents listening in on how much of a slut Adam was.

  Adam’s mom, Honey, came up to me when Winter excused herself to go to the restroom. My arm automatically circled her shoulders and I pulled her into my side. John, Adam’s dad, gave me a hard look like he always did. He wasn’t a fan of other men touching his wife.

  However, I had a wife of my own, so he just gave me the ‘Watch it’ look instead of the full-blown intimidation. The man knew the score though. His wife was a knockout at sixty-two. She was a high school teacher, and the talk of the boy’s locker room, even now.

  John always made an appearance three or four times a year though, just so the boys knew whom she belonged to and didn’t get any funny ideas. John was an intimidating man. At over six feet tall, he was built like a fucking freight train. He was also worked for the railroad and earned those muscles the real way, through hard work and back breaking work.